This week we tackle a concept that should be on the mind of all people, Christian or not. However if someone is a Christian it should be on their mind consistently. That is the habit and practice of teaching and affecting others.
Almost everyone is in a circumstance where they are leading or directing others. Some teach students as their career, others have careers where teaching or educating others is just part of their job, others teach at their church or in their local community or hobby organizations. Even if you are not one of those people that “teach”, you are teaching your families, your friends, your children, your co-workers, and your neighbors with your activities and actions everyday.
To be a good teacher, we first have to meet a few basic requirements. Regardless of the topic, or the age of the person or persons we are educating, we first need to understand and care about the subject to teach and direct others. That understanding and concern is key to any successful teacher / student, mentor / follower, and even parent / child relationship. This point should be obvious, as anyone that is not knowledgeable and concerned about an area will never be respected or revered in it. Many people however, seem to miss that and think that by their mere presence and title that they are effective teachers, educators, and leaders.
As important as knowing and caring about the topic, issue, or subject is, there is something that is even more valuable. That is character and respect. No person will ever learn from a person they do not respect. If the teacher / leader / director / boss / parent does not have respect and character, they will never have success when they try to help, direct, lead, or educate others. People follow people they respect.
The reason that character and respect are so important is that many times students / children / co-workers / friends / neighbors /etc do not learn from what we say but from what we do and how we do it. This is the concept that what is caught is more important then what is taught. Simply, that is people learn more from how you act, and what you say when you are not teaching, then when you are directly “leading” or teaching them.
Let’s consider a pastor. Let’s say that the pastor has a great knowledge of the Bible, and has been trained to be a effective communicator, but they still have no character and does not live a life deserving respect. In that circumstance, no one will learn from them or grow / mature under them. It is not lack of knowledge, nor lack of training, it is lack of quality character and life actions. People may say - “Wow what a great preacher”, but no one will take them seriously if their life does not show a pattern of living what they preach.
This same pattern can be just as true with parents. Parents can love their children, read all the best books, attend the best child raising seminars, and even put their children in the best schools, programs, and teams, but in the end they will not be effective parents if their actions do not live out the traits that they tell their children to emulate. Children will model and act out how the parents really act and live, not how the parents tell their children to act.
So maybe you are not a pastor, and your are not a parent, but the same thing holds true in any other relationships we are in. If we tell our spouses, dates, parents, family or friends that we love them but act the opposite then they will never believe and trust us. When we are at work and we tell every to work harder and smarter, yet we are lazy and effective we will never be respected in the office. If in our church we lead a group, committee, or class and consistently tell others to act, study, research and mature, while not doing any of those things ourselves we will never be respected or emulated. Our habits, actions, activities, priorities, language and decisions teach those around us about our true character. Those are the things we are really showing the world, not the things we tell people to do when we are in front of a group.
If our character and lifestyle does not reinforce the things that we tell others to do, and if our actions do not follow the habits and activities that we encourage others to have, we will never be effective teachers, leaders, parents, bosses, spouses, or any other duty that we choose to take on or any that we find ourselves in.
Back to the caught vs taught principal. Think about how much you learned from your parents. You probably learned the majority of those lessons from how they acted. Sure you may have learned some things from their verbal lessons, or their scoldings maybe, but the majority of the habits and character that you learned from them you learned from observing them. These observations were made day in and day out, not just when your parents were telling you to pay attention, or trying to teach you a lesson.
Parents you must realize that your kids are watching you ALL the time. They see your actions when you are not around others. They hear how you talk about people when the other person is not around. They see you act opposite of the way that you tell them to act. They hear you use words and terms you tell them not to use. They see you look at things you tell them not to look at. They see you participate in things that you tell them to. They watch you prioritize things that you tell them are unimportant. They hear you tell others that you are a friend, or that you will help, and then watch you disappear or never appear when tough times arrive.
This same pattern of emulation and character building is found in relationships with teachers, professors, bosses, and co-workers. The things they say usually account for far less of what you learned from and about them, then the actions and activities you observed in them. If they are always late, unprepared and only seemed concerned about their own issues and life then it is unlikely that you will pattern much of your life after them. When you see people that are prepared, organized, that care, and that constantly reach out to help those around them, you are likely to want to emulate them. The later group may or may not speak and teach as well as the first group, but they are the ones you follow because their life and character are things that show themselves to be worthy of emulation.
Large parts of your character, habits and lifestyle are created by observing others and choosing to follow the examples set by some and by choosing not to follow the examples and habits set by others. In the end, you followed the examples of those you respect, even if those habits and character that you choose are bad. In the same way, you choose to ignore the habits and ways of those that you do not respect. You made these decisions based on things that you observe in the others lives. You did not base these decisions on what they said, or on how they told you to act. You model your life after people not based on the things they say, but on the things that they do and how they go about their lives.
This post is not meant to make you comfortable and satisfied with your current life. It is meant to act as a mirror to your life. It is meant to show you how vital your actions and character are. Telling people what to do will never be as effective as showing them how to live what you are telling them. Christians should be sure to always remember this. The church has been branded by the actions of hypocrites since it’s beginning. People will always talk about the actions of the “worst” Christian they have the misfortune of knowing. As a Christian, you should have a goal to never be “that Christian”. Parents know that your children are watching and will likely emulate your true actions, even if they contradict what you tell them. Supervisors / bosses / owners / leaders know that those below you are likely working how you work, not how you tell them to work. Regardless of your circumstance or state, the Team Swap team hopes that this post will be a positive influence in helping you see the importance of living out the traits, characteristics, and priorities that you tell everyone are important. Be a person that lives out their words with actions and character, not one of words alone.
