Recently those around Team Swap have been thinking more and more about problems. Webster’s dictionary defines a problem as - : 1) an intricate unsettled question, 2) a source of perplexity, distress, or vexation, or 3) a difficulty in understanding or accepting. When we really look at problems we see they fall into two categories - real and perceived. Both have large impacts on the way we live, the lifestyle we pursue, and the way we view the world around us. They are different though, real problems are serious and generally life impacting, where perceived problems are transitory and generally more of an annoyance when we really look at them. Over the next two weeks we are going to break them up into two independent posts. Hopefully somewhere along the way God will show you a bit of what He has put it on our hearts. So, here we go on post #1 - Perceived Problems -
We live in a world where perceived problems are huge. The perceived problems of beauty / looks, social status and other life situations are so common in our society that they are considered to be real problems by many. However, when we closely examine these things we see that they are really not problems. Generally, they are really desires and wants. It would be simple if we could say, well those are not real, so let’s not worry about them and just ignore them. Yet perception is reality, especially when it comes to our own lives and to a great degree the lives of those close to us. When those we barely know have perceived problems it is - “They need to just get over that”, but when we personally, or those close to us, have perceived problems we do not want to follow the same advice that we would give to others.
When a young person say something along the lines of how bad or terrible their world is because they lack a certain look, a certain circle of friends, or a certain ability or skill it is easy to say - “Well that is just a the problem of a child or teenager, and they will live through it” Yet, many times we also see the same issues/ problems, slightly recast in the lives of adults. In the lives of adults those problems are defined as having the wrong clothes for a certain job, the wrong contacts to get a certain promotion or job, wrong set of friends to go to certain places, or the wrong skills \ knowledge to be accepted into a certain circle. These may appear to be real problems, but they are not. They all can be overcome with work and adjustments to lifestyle and priorities. These “problems” have no real permanent impact on the world of the people involved unless the person allows them to continue by not making decisions or changes to affect the issue. In hindsight, these issues usually disappear entirely due to other life issues and decisions, yet when they are occurred they are very real to those they impact.
Telling someone to get over their perceived problems is sort of like telling someone in the woods at night without a flashlight to wait until the sun comes in the morning. Sure when the sun comes up they will discover they were only fifty feet from a open field the entire time. They may have never been in danger, but it felt like it at the time, and that is what controlled their viewpoint on the situation. It is not the reality of the situation that matters, it is not that the issue will pass quickly that matters, it is the fact that it is impacting them significantly at that time that does matter.
When we reach out with God, or more honestly when God uses us to reach out, it is easy for Christians to mishandle people that have problems that seem irrelevant, trivial, insignificant, and that are easily resolved. This occurs because the Christian has a different view on those life and the issues that arise within it. We can not simply just give the hurting person a quick verse, and some spiritual guidance, and then expect them to follow it. Even the mature among us have struggles that should be easily resolved with Christ, yet they remain unresolved due to our lack of desire to make the needed changes.
The perceived problem is really not the issue. The problem is the unwillingness to change to resolve the issue that is affecting us. Maybe it is a change in viewpoint, a change in habits, a change in motivation, a change in priority, or any other number of changes, but what ever change that is required is something that we are not willing to make to help the problem go away. Like the teenager “needing” a new pair of expensive jeans, they know that the expensive jeans that they got six months ago are still good, and that the jeans they “need” now will be outdated in six months to. Their life experience teaches them that, yet the human nature to desire inclusion with those that we respect drives them to ignore their past and go with the feelings of the moments.
In the same manner when we hear people around us talk about how bad their life is, because they can not afford the best of this or that, it should be obvious to them how things all age, wear, break, and such. It is also easy to add the paternal argument that probably 90% of the world would be glad to have what you have now to the mix. Yet, to that person the situation, or circumstance, is dire and dark because what they consider important is not occurring in their life. It is the nature of man to ignore the parts of their life that are good and focus on what they feel is malfunctioning. Sure in hindsight and oversight it is like throwing away a perfectly good machine because one bolt chatters a bit when it operates, but it is human nature because the single bolt is what we notice and it is the thing that draws our attention.
The Christian response, be it to the lost or the saved, should be to help the person see the flaw in their logic and then help them go forward with a better view. The means to accomplish this is not to ignore the perceived problem, or tell the person to ignore it, as that will only allow it to fester and grow into a larger and potentially legitimate issue in the future. We have to help the person eliminate the perceived problem, even if the problem seems irrelevant to us. The Christian world view is not the worlds. Christians must be careful to not trivialize the pains of others even if they are trivial to them. We all have “perceived” problems in our life that are major to us, but trivial to others. We must serve / help others in the same fashion that we would want to be served or helped if we were receiving help instead of giving it.
The means to accomplish this goal is to meet the person where they are, and then help them move from that point to a better future. The simple and brutal nature of “get over it” or “ignore it” does not work unless the person is ready to do either of the above. The good news is if they are ready to move, then the “problem” is already on it’s way to resolution. None of us develop problems, or mind sets, overnight, and they can not be resolved or changed overnight either. That does not mean that the final solution may not come quickly, but the road to that solution usually begins much earlier. We need to be aware of that when we minister. We should resist the instinct to just throw out a quick / instant solution to “perceived” problems and then expect the person to resolve it on their own. We must be willing to help them work through the problem even if we consider it minor.
Christ met people where they were, not where He wanted them to be. He guided them to where they needed to be after He meet them where they were and helped then overcome the problems that were immediate to them at that time. After they resolve those issues, He remained, or left a true follower, to help them deal with additional problems in the future. That is the model of ministry that we should all follow even if the problems are not serious in our eyes. When the problems are more serious the pattern may not change, but the application may, which lead us to the next issue, real problems which we will post on October 29th.
Have a great day, and thank you for your patience in reading this. We know that it was not full of scripture, and that is was more of a overview and general post, but God really has been talking to us about meeting people were they are and helping them there, even if the problems seem small to us.
